If there's one thing I find erotic, it's stuff too weird to be erotic.
Ever notice that there's bad acting in porn flicks?
From: email@example.com (James "Kibo" Parry) Subject: Re: Nicole Kidman story (NC, hanging, snuff) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology,alt.slack Followup-To: alt.religion.kibology Organization: welcome datacomp Date: Wed, 29 Jan 1997 06:05:54 GMT X-Battlestar-Galactica-Date: 7419 centons, 81 microns, .93 hectars X-Kibo-Equipment: a Memex, a Memorator, a Nyctagraph, & Apple BHA In [alt.sex.necrophilia, alt.torture, and alt.sex.asphyx], firstname.lastname@example.org (marquis) wrote: > > Nicole Kidman's jealous husband gives her a computer-controlled slow > hanging in this one. What fun! > > [... first few paragraphs elided...] > "Don't give me that bullshit. I know perfectly well that you fucked > Val Kilmer while you were filming that goddamned Batman movie." > "No, Tom! It isn't true! You know I love you!" Nicole protested. > "All I know is that you're a slut. I know you've been lying to me for > years, and I know you're lying to me now. So go ahead and lie, Nicole. > Enjoy it. Because these are the last lies you'll ever tell." > Tom sat down in front of a Macintosh computer and took hold of the > mouse. There were only three icons on his desktop: the hard drive, the > trash can, and something that looked like a drawing of a gallows from a > child's "hangman" game. Below the gallows was the phrase "Hang 'Em High > 1.0." It was the only software program installed on the computer. This > was, after all, a computer with a very specific purpose. Yep, Macs have completely sewn up the "home executioner" market. Of course, professional executioners usually have Amigas, because they have built-in cremtoria. > Tom double-clicked on the gallows icon. "This program cost me a > fortune," he grumbled. "So it had damn well better work." > The screen was filled with a black and white cartoon of a beautiful, > naked woman dancing on air, a noose tight around her throat. Next to the > cartoon were some words: "Hang 'Em High 1.0 Gallows Operation Utility. > Requires motorized noose winch and electronic trapdoor release (not > included)." > "Yeah, yeah, we have all that shit," Tom muttered impatiently. > "Tom, please..." Nicole begged. > "Shut up, bitch! I'd be more than happy to ball gag you if you don't > stop whining. Ah, here we go." The intro screen vanished, and Tom was > left with two menus labeled "noose" and "trapdoor." Clicking on "noose," > he saw three options: "auto up," "auto down" and "manual." He chose "auto > up." A dialog box asked him to specify, in inches, how far he wanted to > raise the noose . He paused for a moment. He wanted to keep Nicole's > feet on the ground. For this part of the hanging, he wanted her in pain > but able to breathe. He took a guess and entered "5," then hit "return." Excuse me, everyone knows the Mac version of that program has a slider. At least, my copy does. > The winch motor hummed. Nicole started to protest, but she was cut short > as the rope dug into her throat. Her soft, blue eyes bulged in fear and > pain as the noose pulled her up onto her tiptoes. And then she was in the > air, hanging freely, her feet kicking and swinging as she strangled. > "Damn!" Tom cursed under his breath, and quickly selected "manual." > He was presented with an up-arrow and a down-arrow; positioning the > pointer over the down-arrow, he clicked and held the mouse button. The > motor hummed again, and Nicole returned to the earth. Tom held the mouse > button down until Nicole's toes began to brush against the gallows > platform. When he released the button, she was perfectly positioned: > standing on her tiptoes, she could avoid complete strangulation, but Tom > could tell by the look on her face that breathing was difficult and very > painful for her. I like the fact that Tom Cruise is too wimpy to actually hang Nicole without using a computer to pull the rope. Scientology'll do that to you. Scientologists are maladjusted because they can't kill people!!! > Tom turned now to his "trapdoor" menu. Here he had three options: > "manual," "timed" and "random." He hesitated here. He had planned on > setting the trapdoor to drop after a certain period of time, but there was > something exciting about the "random" option, so he selected that > instead. The dialog box read: "%chance of drop each minute." Tom > entered "1," because he wanted Nicole to suffer through a nice, long > period of partial strangulation before she hanged for real. There was > another field which read: "Begin checking after __ minutes." Tom entered > "90." That was good. This is the only piece of snuff pornography I've ever seen that reads like a page from Apple's Human Interface Guidelines. Except there's no wacky poetry about the dogcow. "Moof!" said Clarus, the dogcow. "Wooo!" said Spot, the cowdog. > Now Nicole would be held right where she was for at > least an hour and a half, and probably much longer. The trap would most > likely drop out from under her feet after she had been through three or > four hours of agony. Best of all, she wouldn't have any idea when to > expect it. Even Tom didn't know when it would happen. > Tom took a moment and explained to Nicole what he had done. She was > giving most of her attention to the very challenging project of trying to > breathe, but something in her eyes told him that she understood. Tom > switched on the videocamera and made sure that it was pointing right at > his suffering wife. Tom's new girlfriend was deeply into asphyxiation. > She loved to play hanging games, and when Tom had told her of his plans > for Nicole, she had made him promise to film the session. Tom knew that > the video of Nicole's hanging would drive his girlfriend wild; no doubt > she would put it on Tom's big-screen TV and fuck his brains out repeatedly > as they watched Nicole die over and over, in infinite slow-mo repeat. The very best part is that the "find the frame where she dies" video party game is a LOT harder than normal when the decedent has never displayed a facial expression in her life. Can Nicole be said to be alive if she can neither give nor receive Ericksonian strokes? (Psychologists: I'm talking about the OTHER Erickson.) > "So long, Nicole," Tom said. "You were a good lay. Too bad you were > such a cunt." Nicole gagged softly. Tom turned and left her hanging, > locking the door behind him. > Nicole stared at the locked door in pain and disbelief. He was really > doing it! Her husband was murdering her! And he didn't even have the > decency to grant her a clean, easy death. He had to make sure she > suffered first, suffered tremendously. > And she WAS suffering. God, it hurt so much, and she had only just > begun! From what Tom had told her, she knew that she had hours of this to > endure. She didn't see how she could do it. She gazed in horror at the > computer which was silently counting the seconds to her eventual doom. > What a cold, impersonal thing it was, this electronic hangman! Tom didn't > even have the courage to hang her himself; he had to get a machine to do > it for him...and another machine to watch it for him, she added to > herself, glancing at the camera. He didn't even care about her enough to > stay and watch her die. Somehow that made it all hurt even more. Suddenly, Bob Saget popped up and got into a fistfight with William Shatner over the video rights! Saget punched Shatner in the hair, breaking his fist. Shatner responded by sucking in his gut, abruptly decreasing the oxygen content of the room by several cubic feet. Saget passed out and Shatner attached him to a Pentium Pro running at 220MHz under Windows NT 4.0 and then further wacky adventures ensued that can be seen on alt.sex.stories.snuff.startrek.computers. > She imagined him watching the videotape, enjoying it with his new > girlfriend. What would they see? Nicole was a gorgeous young woman; she > had no illusions about that, and Tom had dressed her--or undressed > her--for her death. Apart from a slip of lacy, black silk, she was > entirely naked. She was naked except for her clothes--just like YOUUUUUUU!!!!!! > The slip had spaghetti straps which plunged to a low > neckline, revealing her meatballs and free crazy bread! > ample cleavage. Her breasts were round and firm; > Tom had always liked them. Nicole's nipples were very hard now, for > reasons she didn't quite understand. She imagined that they were poking > rather conspicuously through the thin black silk. The slip was quite > short; it showed off her smooth, sleek, well-turned legs. It also > revealed quite a bit of creamy, white thigh. Nicole decided that she > probably looked pretty great in her slip. But she was in agony; what > would that do to her appearance? She imagined what her face must look > like: eyes bulging out in pain, tongue rolling out of her mouth, tears > pouring down her cheeks. She imagined her soft, red hair in a disarray > around her face. She listened to the soft, desperate gagging sounds she > made as she strangled. Did Tom really think that was sexy? Obviously he > did. Nicole tried to understand. There WAS something pretty sexy about > being this helpless. And there was a certain familiar rhythm to the way > she moved as she struggled; it was actually quite similar to the way her > body moved when she was fucking. She thought this to herself as her body hung limply like an eel stunned by a lakeful of dynamite. >[several paragraphs of Nicole thinking about display an emotion, elided] > Just when she felt as if she couldn't possibly endure another minute of > torture, there was a beep from the computer, and Nicole's world fell out > from under her. This was it! She was swinging freely, dancing on air; > she was well and truly hanged. She felt an overwhelming sense of relief. > She was almost free. But she still had some work left to do. The noose > was even tighter at her throat now, and it had strangled her completely. > She found herself panicking as she realized her breathing was totally cut > off. She began to kick desperately. These were her death throes, the > last helpless struggles of a dying woman. Her entire body quivered with > the tension. She arched her back, thrusting her pert, proud breasts > forward. She felt her bladder relax; warm piss trickled down her naked > thighs. "Goodbye, Tom," she thought. "I hope you enjoy my death..." And > then she relaxed, still and lifeless in the noose. Then the Mac said "System Error, ID=03" and rebooted. Nicole turned into a baby! -- K. That last part's fantasy, like the part about Tom Cruise being intelligent enough to use a mouse.
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