From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: Girl geeks and fanfic. Date: Tue, 26 Feb 2002 00:18:58 -0800 > Rose Marie Holt (rmholt1@mindspring.com) wrote: > > > > On buying a drink, you shouldnt start that way. You should start up the > > conversation first. When you buy someone a drink it is almost a > > mini-date. So you want to get some idea if you are having enough > > fun that it is a mini-date. For some reason that last sentence is worded so it seems like something Archimedes Plutonium would say. "In 1991, I came up with my theory of the mini-date. If you buy a woman a cup of spaghetti and are having enough fun then it is a mini-date. No mini-date has ever reached fusion break-even. When a mini-date does not work out, then the Moon must be soft-landed on that mini-date." > > Someone who buys me a drink right off the bat makes me very self > > conscious and a little wary. Has Ozzy Osbourne ever bought you a drink right off the bat, while it's still alive? Xcott Craver (Caj@Spamela.BrainHz.com) wrote: > > True story: a friend of mine was at a bar in Berkeley once > (I could have sworn I told this story before,) when some > d00d sidled up to her as she ordered a drink. He pulled out > his wallet and asked the bartender, "how much is that?" I guess > he wasn't expecting it would be so pricey, and so he offered to > pay for *half* the drink in exchange for her phone number. > > That's the kind of line that causes you to spend the rest > of your life thinking up snappy comebacks. Honestly, what > would you say if told something like that? No contest: "Sure, '555-'. Thanks." > -X > > ["How 'bout I kick you in half o' yer nuts if you don't go away?"] I wish I could make a Roald Dahl reference here involving "I hope it's the half that eats" but I don't see how to work that in so I'll just start singing the Oompa-Loompa song to myself. Hey, can I buy anyone a drink? It tastes like a whole dinner with BLUEBERRY PIE! -- K. Somewhere there probably is a guy with a fetish for blue spotlights shining on people in a hard plastic shell. And if the Internet didn't exist, I would probably never even consider the possibility. But because the Internet exists, we can now ASSUME we can find such a guy. (Maybe he'll post a followup.) ----------------------------------------------------- From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: Now I could be wrong... Date: Tue, 26 Feb 2002 00:22:32 -0800 Glenn Knickerbocker (NotR@bestweb.net) wrote: > > James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) wrote: > > > > I am being very careful not to go in the half of this room > > that contains a WebTV. > > Of cousre, it wouldn't require quite so much care if they didn't divide > it in half with a logarithmic spiral. I think they're just using the cheap sort of spiral, the kind depicted on the playfield art of the "Twilight Zone" pinball machine, because this is just a Holiday Inn Express. Leah was kind enough to drive me from the airport to the hotel, and we went in and she looked at all the brass edges on everything and said something like, "This is a swanky Holiday Inn!" I plopped my Holiday Inn card onto the desk and said, "Hello, I made a Web reservation under this name," and the moment the lady at the desk heard the phrase "Web reservation" she said, "You PROBABLY want the Holiday Inn EXPRESS out back," so we went around the block to the one that's not a REAL Holiday Inn but a Holiday Inn EXPRESS which is just like the other one except facing the other way and apparently it goes faster or something. But fortunately, everyone else wanted to stay at the swanky one, so the Holiday Inn Express gave me a free upgrade to the swankiest suite at the non-swanky hotel so I WON!!! Plus this one faces TOWARDS the 1962 World's Fair while the other one just faces nothing so I think I have a better view of the world of the future of forty years ago. Although usually I can only see the bottom half of the Space Needle because it seems to be foggy and rainy once in a while, usually for about a week. Holiday Inn Express apparently came about when they absorbed some competing chain of hotels and had all these redundant locations they had to rename in some way. So they made the new ones Expresses and then they had to swankify the old ones in order to make the new ones seem more Expressish in comparison. And then they started running TV commercials telling you you're stupid if you go to the Express instead of the more upscale one. The commercials go like this: RANDOM PERSON: Hey, this horribly injured accident victim! DUMB GUY: Duh, let me help! I have a power drill! RANDOM PERSON: Are you a neurosurgeon? DUMB GUY: Duh, no, but I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express! NARRATOR: You won't be smarter, but you'll feel smarter! The subtle message is "IDIOTS LIKE HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS THEREFORE SO WILL YOU." Me, I'm the only guy who likes Holiday Express even though I'm not an idiot. Maybe that's why they gave me the room with the jacuzzi. Next time I'll do a controlled experiment and see if I still get a jacuzzi when I register while holding my idiot sign. -- K. It says "WANT ROOM, AM IDIOT." ----------------------------------------------------- From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: I'm on a 767-300ER, and I am wondering, where's the onboard ER? Date: Tue, 26 Feb 2002 00:25:30 -0800 Schwa Love (schwa242@yahoo.com) wrote: > > James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) wrote: > > > > It's one of those [planes] where when the previous occupant left > > the volume of the armrest turned up all the way, you can clearly > > hear music playing, even without the headset. > > Wow! Were they the old kind of earphone jacks where the earphones are > basically two rubber tubes that blow noisy air into your ears? Any plane > I've been on in the past decade had the boring modern earphone jacks that > let you plug standard headphones in. I miss the old kind. Often I get those, and often I'm on planes that don't have in-flight entertainment of any sort (little jets like LearJets and CRJs, which are really the same thing with different logos) and only rarely do I get the ones where they let people use their own headphones but still demand a five-dollar "entertainment charge". Just once I'd like to see someone demand their money back after the movie. I mean the money for the film, not the money for the whole trip. Although it would be kind of fun to demand a dollar off your fare every time the "Fasten Seat Belts" sign beeps, making the plane shake. By the way, why is there always that layer of bumps right over LaGuardia? Does Queens have chunk-style smog? -- K. Queens has lots of White Castles, so every cloud of beefy smog could have five little holes in it. ----------------------------------------------------- From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: sci.physics,alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: I want more Date: Tue, 26 Feb 2002 00:26:34 -0800 Dan Brandon (dbrandon@kosher.rcn.com) wrote: > > James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) wrote: > > > > Your homework is to calculate how many dancing angels can be covered > > by one of Kibo's feet at one time. > > Are you making wine out of angels again? Remember how I used to complain that when Lucille Ball stepped on all those grapes, she said it felt "like stepping on eyeballs", and I wanted to know why she knew that? Well, all I can say is that angels are pointier than eyeballs. -- K. Pointier, but tastier. ----------------------------------------------------- From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: A milestone! Date: Tue, 26 Feb 2002 01:31:33 -0800 My digital camera just passed picture number 9999 and went to picture 0001. Apparently on Planet Nikon they use base nine thousand nine hundred ninety-nine, which makes their math even sillier than the eleven-fingered Psychlos'. The ten thousandth photo is one of the Space Needle (with tiny people at the top staring down at me), and so the winner of the betting pool is Eugene Delbert, who wrote "pointy building with revolving round restaurant, or vice versa" on his entry form. He wins a trip to the 1962 World's Fair, when it reopens precisely 9999 years after 1962. However, to keep me from getting confused by this base 9999 math, the camera placed the first 9999 photos in folder "100" and the next 9999 will go in folder "101". The betting pool on what happens when I get to 999 folders of 9999 photos is now open. -- K. We should switch from decimal to duodecimal because then my camera would be able to hold more photos, for free! Plus because all prices end in ".99", you'd always get more change back from your 144-cent dollar. ----------------------------------------------------- Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Subject: Cap'n Crunch is the oldest living hippie Date: Mon, 4 Mar 2002 06:47:53 GMT Here's a new one, commercial-wise... While watching cartoons this morning, I saw a commercial for a weird cross-promotion between Crayola crayons and Cap'n Crunch cereal. It seems that Crayola is on the verge of adding another new color to their box of 128 (or 256 or 512) crayons, presumably meaning they'll have to discontinue one of the 123 (or 251 or 507) colors nobody uses. And, as always, they're drumming up hype over this major crayon innovation by letting kids "vote" on which of the potential new colors looks the best. Or in this case, tastes the best. Cap'n Crunch's Crunchberries have changed from the old-fashioned blistering magenta color to three new Crayola-brand colors, so kids can determine which potential new crayon will have the crunchiest, tangiest taste. The commercial does mention (quietly) that they have the "same great berry flavor" they used to, but still, the concept that WOW! NOW MY FOOD LETS ME PRETEND I'M EATING YUMMY CRAYONS! makes me think Cap'n Crunch should be court-martialed, keel-hauled, or at least made to walk the plank into a vat of molten wax. And that's not even the really scary part. The candidates for new Crayola colors which are current Crunchberry colors include Outrageous Orange (it's like regular orange except it causes people to write editorials complaining about it), something-or-other Green (it's like regular green except with a new name so exciting I can't even remember it) and... ...Mellow Yellow. That's right, now you can pretend your cereal is made of crayons made of drugs. Instead of journeying to the bottom of your oatmeal bowl to see the crudely-drawn bunny, now you can eat Cap'n Crunch and journey to the center of your mind! Oh wow, it's like eating a planet made of crunch. Of course, commercials for weirdly-colored kids' foods always show the kids biting into the stuff and then freakin' out into a trippy world of multi-colored candy swirls and flying fruits (and in some cases undergoing hideous genetic damage, like in the Gushers commercials where the kid's head turns into a watermelon slice.) But do they have to be so overt about the psychedelic nature of confetti-colored cereals? "Taste the rainbow" with Skittles! "Go koo-koo" for Cocoa Puffs! And now, experience a Crunchberry freakout with the tricky trippy taste of new Mellow Yellow Crunchberries! They're toasted, and you'll be too! Try 'em with Kool-Aid and Gushers and Fruit Roll-Ups for a FAR-OUT BLAST OF FREAKY FRUIT! YOU'LL BLOW YOUR CANDY MIND! I knew that Cap'n Crunch was a countercultural hero -- after all, he invented the Atari 2600 -- but I didn't know he was turning kindergartners on to recreational drugs. At least Mellow Yellow is the most harmless one out there, given that it's made entirely from banana peels. And in cereal form, you can put milk on it and -- WHAT? NUTRASWEET IS "MADE FROM INGREDIENTS FOUND IN BANANAS AND MILK"? OH NO, MELLOW YELLOW IS INCREDIBLY DEADLY!!!! -- K. But at least it's not "TUH-WISTED!" ----------------------------------------------------- Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Subject: Putting the "fun" back in "slime mold". Date: Tue, 5 Mar 2002 08:29:26 GMT I ated a fungus! I ated a fungus! And it weren't no regular mushroom! Yesterday CNN Headline News told me that a "mycoprotein"-based meat substitute was coming to the United States, and that it was sold under the brand name "corn". This bothered me -- trying to pass off fungus protein as a vegetable is at least as intellectually offensive as trying to simulate beef with some sort of mildew -- but today I actually saw the stuff on sale at a local market, and it turns out the brand name is spelled "Quorn". Never eat anything that starts with "Q". When in Toronto, don't buy quinces at Queen's Quay. Furthermore, you should never eat anything named by Klingons. Despite my fear of this queer Quorn, I quickly inspected a quantity of Quorn products which were quiescently frozen in my grocer's freezer. I resolved to purchase one and eat it so that you wouldn't have to. I passed over the "Beef-Style Recipe Grounds" and grabbed a box of "Chicken-Style Nuggets". First an important message about mycoprotein, from the back of the box: -> WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR? -> -> It took you only seconds to discover our wholesome, all-natural -> line of Quorn(tm) meat-free cuisine. Translation: Here, read this essay which explains why you should make a snap decision to buy this product, unlike all the good foods which don't NEED sales essays on the box. -> It took us a bit longer to find the ideal protein source for -> its key ingredient. Translation: All the ones that tasted good cost too much. -> After 15 years of searching in many parts of the world, we -> finally found what we were looking for. And it was growing -> literally in our own backyard! Translation: Duh, we're stupid. -> "Mycoprotein" comes from a small, unassuming member of the -> mushroom family, Translation: It's not a mushroom, it's a "member of the mushroom family". This means it's a weird kind of fungus, such as mildew, slime mold, puffball, or ringworm. Also, it's very unassuming, compared to those snooty mushrooms. We use only unpretentious slime mold. -> which we ferment like yogurt. Translation: We add live bacteria to the moldy fungus to create the perfect blend of rotting and infectious. -> Ounce for ounce, this unique ingredient contains: -> -> * Almost as much protein as an egg Translation: Even less protein than an egg. -> * Twice the fiber of fresh broccoli Translation: Cardboard. -> * About half the calories and a third less fat than -> skinless chicken breast Translation: About half the calories and a third less fat than skinless chicken breast, with none of that annoying chicken flavor! -> * Zero cholesterol Translation: It's just as good for you as eating nothing at all. -> That's all very healthy, but we know you're also looking -> for great taste. Translation: Who needs flavor when you can read this exciting essay? -> Happily, Quorn products not only contain mycoprotein, Translation: We were originally in the cracker business, but the fire sprinklers went off and the crackers got all soggy and then a week later they were green and fuzzy, so we decided to call them Quorn. -> but also have the great taste you're looking for. Translation: These taste the same whether you taste them with your mouth or your eyeballs. -> That's why, in Europe, where people are rather particular -> about the way things taste, Translation: The Microsoft Word spellchecker didn't know "peculiar". -> Quorn is the number-one selling meat-free brand. Translation: Quorn is the number one selling meat-free brand assuming you don't count those millions of products which don't pretend to be fake meat. Unless you're dumb enough to believe that Pringles and Bubble Yum are made from meat. -> We hope Quorn meat-free cuisine sounds like what you've been -> looking for. Translation: We desperately hope you'll buy some of this stuff before it eats our warehouse. And if we claim you taste with your eyes, and you see with your ears, then maybe we can trick you into assuming our mycoprotein comes from peyote. -> One thing's for certain: If you like what's on our package, -> you'll love what's in it. Translation: If you liked this essay, you'll eat anything. Okay, enough about the propaganda. What are the ingredients? Hmm, the ingredients are mysteriously missing. Oh, I see what happened -- the ingredients were cleverly printed on the little strip I had to tear off and throw away before I could dump the fungal nuggets into the oven. Let me just fish the fungus's vital statistics out of the trash can: -> We do not use ingredients that were produced using modern -> biotechnology. Translation: The best way to grow fungus is still slave labor and lots of horse poop. -> Ingredients: Mycoprotein*, rehydrated egg white, wheat flour, -> onion, rapeseed oil, wheat starch. Contains 2% or less of -> wheat gluten, salt, rice flour, dextrose, yeast, autolyzed -> yeast extract, whey protein concentrate, tapioca starch, -> pectin, natural flavors from non-meat sources, ascorbic acid, -> garlic powder, pepper, citric acid, onion powder, gum arabic. -> Allergic consumers: This product contains wheat, egg, and -> milk ingredients. -> * Mushroom in origin, 40% of product. Translation: Don't be afraid, less than half of it is what we claimed it was. Most of it's not even real mycoprotein. We make our products from fungus extender. So, how did the fake chicken-style-flavor-like nuggets taste? Much like all the other meatless chicken nuggets on the market. In other words, they tasted like breading. These nuggets had lots of black pepper in the breading -- the "Quorn" filling by itself has what could be a faint mushroom or egg flavor, or possibly it was my imagination as the flavor was about as strong as a wet paper towel. The texture was softer and moister than the soy-based fake chicken nuggets I've encountered. Of course, keep in mind that these nuggets are not truly vegan, as they contain plenty of egg white (second ingredient on the list) and some whey -- the brands that are ALL soy are truly awful, dry, chewy things. Quorn tastes better than the truly vegan meat substitutes, but then again, so do lots of other things I wouldn't bother eating. To cleanse my palate, I ate some Slim Jims during the mildew nugget feast. The Slim Jims had a more meat-like texture, possibly because they almost qualify as a kind of meat (Slim Jims are made from cow faces and pureed chickens.) Incidentally, I did some research, and found that the "unassuming" fungus from which mycoprotein is made is from the species Fusarium graminearum. It's a microscopic fungus which lives in dirt. One botanical Web site describes it nicely: => Fusarium is characterized by the production of slimy, hyaline, => septate, canoe-shaped conidia (known as macroconidia) that in most => species are produced in fruiting-structures called sporodochia. They look like sickle cells, only slimy. And hyaline. I don't know what hyaline is, but from the context I will assume it can't mean "not slimy". Another site warns me of the dangers of the 1500 known Fusarium species: -> Despite intensive research, efforts to control Fusarium fungal -> infections and prevent or eliminate the presence of its mycotoxins -> in foods have not met with a great deal of success. Fusaria cause -> diseases, such as ear rot in corn and head blight and scab in wheat, -> that affect growth and yield of crops and were estimated to cause a -> loss of a billion dollars to wheat farmers in the USA in 1993. -> In addition, toxins produced by these fungi can be present, particularly -> in grains and grain products, in human foods and animal feeds. EEEEEEEEEEEEK! If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go check the expiration date on my bottle of Ipecac. -- K. Unless Ipecac is also made from slime molds, in which case I'll scream. On second thought, I'll just eat some more Slim Jims. Mmm, cow head in stick form. ----------------------------------------------------- Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Subject: Uh... duh? Date: Thu, 7 Mar 2002 01:11:59 GMT From the Web site of Channel 7 in New Mexico: -> Fatal Shooting -> -> A man is dead after a shooting in northeast Albuquerque on Monday night. -> -> Albuquerque Police tell Action 7 News that the man who was shot, 18 year -> old Carlos Chavez, was part of a group of three people who tried to rob a -> gun owner. -> -> Police say Chavez and his two friends, 18 year-old Arthur Pacheco and -> 21-year-old Joseph Vallegos, saw an ad in the paper for a gun. Police tell -> us when they met the gun owner, they beat him and sprayed him with mace in -> an attempt to steal the gun. The gun owner was also armed. I can only imagine the snickering that broke out in the newsroom when someone was typing up this story. "Hey, guys, listen to this sentence I just wrote: 'The gun owner was also armed.'" Now, if they were smart, they would have waited for him to sell the gun to someone else, because then he'd have more money and no gun, unless he was selling the gun because he had better guns in his collection, which I'm sure he did because, hey, there are idiots who want to steal your valuable guns. Note that the robbers made the mistake of spraying him with a nutmeg-flavored spice ("mace") instead of tear gas ("Mace"). Uh oh, a couple weeks ago I told Kurt Stocklmeir all about the wonders of mace. I hope he doesn't try to stick up anyone with a packet of egg nog seasoning blend. KURT, PUT DOWN THAT RICE PUDDING! -- K. Fun facts about nutmeg (mace grows inside nutmeg fruits): Nutmeg is a hallucinogen. About half a nutmeg pit will apparently cause you to trip out. No, I'm not going to try it. I hate nutmeg. One Web page introduced me to a meme: => In the nutmeg trade, broken nutmegs => that have been infested by pests => are referred to as "BWP grade" => (broken, wormy and punky). From now on I shall refer to many things as BWP grade. For instance, Ezio Greggio's brain. ----------------------------------------------------- Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Subject: Ay yi yi, el agua pinka es XTREMO! Date: Fri, 8 Mar 2002 22:37:06 GMT New Gatorade sighting: The "Citrico", "Mango", and "Tropical" flavors (which are designed to be sold in the U.S. but pronounced in Spanish) are now officially designated "XTREMO". And remember, if there's no accent mark the stress goes on the next-to-last syllable, so it's pronounced "ga-to-RA-de". -- K. It's too bad Ricky Ricardo is dead. Just think, if "I Love Lucy" were still in production, Ricky would be chugging down bottles of Gatorade XTREMO. While smoking. "Little Ricky, I am shocked to learn you have a drug problem! Here, have some Gatorade XTREMO and some fine Philip Morris cigarettes instead." P.S. Yes, it's "el agua" and not "la agua", because water is masculine, and it's "la mano" because "Manos: The Hands Of Fate" was a chick flick. Highly irregular. (Cue fake Burt Bacharach music as Kibo begins doing the Frug while dressed as Mr. Spock.) (degree of difficulty: 8.3) ----------------------------------------------------- Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Subject: I wish *I* could turn into two independent motorcycles. Date: Fri, 8 Mar 2002 23:03:04 GMT [from the Chicago Sun-Times] -> -> Passenger seat is open again for Cruise's film -> -> March 7, 2002 -> -> by Cindy Pearlman -> -> Tom Cruise still feels the need--the need for speed. -> -> The actor is developing a remake of the 1975 drive-in favorite -> "Death Race 3000" to star in and produce. Is he also doing the George Orwell classic, "2984"? And what about "21,000 Leagues Under The Sea"? (Well, that would be impossible, because everyone knows the ocean is only 20,000 leagues deep.) I think probably Ms. Pearlman mean to say that Tom Cruise was planning a remake of "Death Race 2000" with the title changed to "Death Race 3000" to make it a thousand cooler. You know, like David Hasselhoff's "Super Knight Rider 3000" project which will supposedly improve on "Knight Rider 2000", "Knight Rider 2010", and "Team Knight Rider" (the one with the car that could magically change into two motorcycles six feet apart.) See, by adding a thousand to it, it gets a thousand better. GOSH, IT'S TOO BAD THEY CANCELLED "MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000" BEFORE THEY COULD MAKE FUN OF THAT. -> Director Paul Anderson (the upcoming "Resident Evil") told GLARE, Who's GLARE? The Gay/Lesbian Alliance for Ridiculous Entertainment? Green-Lighting Awfully Rotten Epics? Giant Lobsters Amid Random Explosions? -> "Tom plays Frankenstein, the best driver in the world. But he has -> that nickname because he's been in so many crashes. He's a little -> bit beat up. He's a little reckless." -> -> The movie is revving up in a not-so-reckless way. *cough*cough* OH NO! HERE COME THE DANCING BEARS OF COUGHING! THEY'RE MARCHING OVER THE HORIZON, GLOWING AND SPARKLING AND COUGHING! THEY'RE POINTING AT THAT SENTENCE AND COUGHING! THEY'RE GIVING OUT COUPONS FOR FREE WHEEL ALIGNMENT AND POINTING AND COUGHING AND GLOWING AND SPARKLING AND THAT WAS STUPID! -> Last week, a script was turned in to Paramount. It's a return -> to the driver's seat for Cruise, who also did "Days of Thunder." Hey Ben Stiller! Remember how you made fun of Tom Cruise in that movie where he drove the car really fast to win the big race? And how you made fun of him in that movie where he drove the plane really fast to win the big plane race? Well, that mean Tom Cruise is forcing you to repeat yourself! He's ruining your career! -> Cruise fell in love with ex-wife Nicole Kidman on the set of that film. Yes... but... where... did... she... get... that... acting... talent... she... displayed... in... "Eyes"... "Wide"... "Shut"? She... must... have... a... lot... of... it... saved... up... because... she... doled... it... out... so... slowly... in... that... very... very... disappointing... Kubrick... film... which... was... so... diss... a... ppointing. -> Will he get into that same gear again? I asked Anderson if he's -> casting Cruise's current love Penelope Cruz as the female lead. "We -> really haven't gotten around to casting the female lead yet," he -> hedged. "I'm not even thinking about it." There's always a possibility he'll find a new girlfriend whose name he can't spell. -> He can divulge a few fast plot secrets. "We've updated the movie in -> that it's not a race across America. It's now a race around the world. WOW!!! That's as awesome an improvement as if in "Citizen Kane 3000" there were TWO sleds! -> The cars are just amazing, too. They can fire missiles, become -> invisible, (record low special-effects budget) -> split and then re-form. WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! DANGER, DAVID HASSELHOFF! REMAKE OF "TEAM KNIGHT RIDER" DETECTED! Except that I think instead of having the car turn into two motorcycles that talk in sassy voices they'll just have to motorcycles say "Vrr!" and "Ooom!" to maintain the sense of realism. I wonder if "Super Knight Rider 3000" or "Death Race 3000" will be released first? If I were David Hasselhoff, I'd want my movie to be last, so that I could change the title to "Super Knight Rider 3001" and I'd WIN! Unless Tom Cruise is smart enough to do "Death Race Infinity Plus Double Infinity No Givebacks". But I think the chances of Tom Cruise being that smart are pretty slim. I mean, he'd not only have to know about "infinity", but also "no givebacks". -> It's a real high-tech adventure." As opposed to all those OTHER movies which contain PRETEND adventures! -> Anderson added, "One of the best scenes is a car breaking the sound -> barrier with a sonic blast on a river of all ice. The ice begins to -> crack and shatter. It will be amazing." Better yet, an invisible car that travels through time underwater inside a volcano filled with molten lava, all of which is also invisible! -> Another tidbit: "I'd love to cast Sly Stallone and bring him back as -> the same character he played in the first one. He was a great -> Machine Gun Joe," the director said. Yes, he was one of the best Machine Gun Joes ever. -- K. You know, the guy who played Automan in "Automan" once starred in a movie titled "America 3000". I was thinking they should do a remake titled "America 3000 3000" to cash in on this "add a '3000'" craze but then I realized, with "Tron 2.0" in the works, won't he be busy making a knockoff of the new "Tron" called "Automan 3.000"? I think the other star of "Automan" (Desi Arnaz Jr.) will need to get of his butt and start working on "Turbo I Love Lucy VR" or something if he doesn't want to be behind the times.