From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: sci.physics,alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: zero godz Virgil gets fucked. Followup-To: alt.drugs.webtv Date: Wed, 03 Sep 2003 00:44:39 -0400 In sci.physics, "tj Frazir" (GravityPhysics@webtv.net) wrote: > > get yer fucking 1001 spam off topic shit out of here or Ill beat your > ass bitch. > Ill fuck with your world like a trash toy. > Ill pay the town paper and have a full page of your 1001 cross > posting. > Then Ill yank yer service !!! > If I dont own yer server one of my frieends do or owns his ass. > get yer dumb fucking shi out of here where I cant see you ,,,white yer > goast in the machine.. > NO ONE walks threw here with out me poping into your back door and > looking at yer shit. I don't think the word "pope" is a transitive verb. "I'm gonna git medieval on yo' ass" is _not_ the same thing as "I'm gonna git Roman Catholic on yo' ass", although there is a certain similarity. I do appreciate your attempt to write this entire post in ecclesiastical Latin, but I'm afraid you did it so poorly that it you accidentally made it almost look like English in spots. > Im not the best Im the builder an know things you dont. > Im a rich rich giant and YOU are going to make front page and the > whole damb page in yer home town,,, Oh, come on. You couldn't even get George Hammond onto the front page. > 30,000 people next to you will want to kick your ass ,,, Ill spend more > money fucking you over than you could posibly make in yeer life. > Ill spend 5000 on paper adds in yer home town and post yer dumb shit. > The paper is open today ....lets play fuck vergil. > YOUR here VIRGIL so U play MY games. > Im going to ram your 1001 cross post up yer cornhole > motherfcker.......... > VIRGIL VMJR2 MOONRAKER > SEX HARD BLACK !*=A9=F8=DF=86=9C=B5=B5=B5=B5 > =85=91=DF=BA=BA=DF=9C=86=AE=86=AE=A2=B6=AE=B6=B6=AE=B5=B3fa > ???????? ???????????? ?????? > NO motherfucker ,,,, FUCKED YOU> > ???? ???????? ??? > Im conecting you to the circus .............. > your phone will ring so much you cant call out .. > FREE SEX Dogfart > I have your ass on this page .......... > Evrytime I say city and free sex they will call you................. > evrytime I say free drugs they call you... > but first lets see if virgil gets busted for dope .. > DRUGS <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< > dont do what you do and even fuck with me ! > Yer an inch fromm going away Yer an inch from being Manley Hubbell. When your Moonraker gets to Gravolti, tell Richard Kiel I said hello. By the way, who's Virgil, and why are you pretending to have so much sex with him? -- K. So many words, so much punctuation, and yet none of it's arranged into anything resembling anything as coherent as, say, Bucky Fuller under dental gas. ----------------------------------------------------- From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: old children's magazines (was: Bubbly Milk) Date: Wed, 03 Sep 2003 02:53:56 -0400 Schwa Love (schwa242@yahoo.com) wrote: > > James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) wrote: > > > > Other long-extinct kids' magazines of the 1970s and 1980s: "Odyssey", > > which was a science magazine, and "The Electric Company" (I think they > > might still print "Sesame Street", but there's no point now that > > Elmo's taken over.) I always liked the page numbers in "Sesame Street" > > (they were always pictures of things you could count, such as Big Bird > > blowing a monotonically-increasing series of soap bubbles.) > > Odyssey was specialized towards astronomy, at least when I read it. Well, > that and nine panel comics about a robot travelling into antimatter > universes and rooting for the Milwaukee Brewers. You're right, astronomy is not science. I had it confused with astrology. > Other kids magazines besides "Highlights for Children" included: > > "Ranger Rick": Conservation is fun. Give a hoot, don't pollute, etc. And raccoons are your friends! Even though they wear the same domino masks as all the jewel thieves in crummy Disney comedies, and even though they will eat your hands when you try to pet them and then you die of rabies. > "Enter": My favorite from the Children's Television Workshop, though it > never had it's own television series. Had programs for various home > computer platforms (they even added a Timex Sinclair 2068 section after I > sent them a whiny letter). Later, as it's popularity waned, it was made > into a section of "3-2-1 Contact", though that section disappeared and was > replaced by a section for "Square One Television". I don't remember that magazine at all. Probably a good thing I never saw it, because I might have written in saying "I don't have a Timex Sinclair 2068! Please remove that section!" and then they would have done it, and if I signed my letter "No givebacks!" you'd be unable to undo it, especially because I called no boomerang zones. > "3-2-1 Contact": I think this was actually advertised as, "For graduates > of The Electric Company" unless it was "The Electric Company" that was > advertised as "For graduates of Sesame Street". Perhaps both are true. I never had "3-2-1 Contact", but yeah, "Sesame Street" was supposed to prepare your mind for the psychedelic assault of readin' power that was "The Electric Company", the grooviest, funkiest, Morgan Freemanest way to learn that reading is cool even though Fonzie wasn't involved. If Morgan Freeman and Henry Winkler had a cool-off, Easy Reader would win and Fonzie would have to wear a tu-tu for the rest of his life. > "Boy's Life": The magazine for boy scouts and cub scouts and, yes, even > Webelos. Had tales of True Scout Courage, as well as instructions to build > pinebox derby cars, better fires, or robots out of an old trash can, some > motors, and PVC pipe. Didn't really read it much as I didn't really care > for being a scout. I once drew some cartoons they didn't, or wouldn't, print. > "Jack and Jill" and "Humpty Dumpty": I vaguely remember these, though I > know one of them reprinted Tin Tin comics. I think they always had ads for > Keane art on the back cover. Printed on newsprint, nothing glossy. One of those two magazines is the reason why, to this day, I hate "Tintin". I also hate his baby hair and his "WOAH!" and "BOUM!". I think it was French class that taught me to hate "Asterix", though. That, and that movie Etienne recommended. Hey, if Snowy and Ideefixe got into a fight, who would care who would win? > "Peanut Butter": From the fine folks at Scholastic... was more of a > monthly activity book than anything else. A bunch of little cardboard > figures to punch out, comics, and games. > > "Weekly Reader": OK, not really a magazine, just a folded over sheet (or > two) of newsprint to pretend like it was a REAL newspaper for kids! Looks > like they're still around: > > http://www.weeklyreader.com/homepage.asp The other Scholastic/Xerox brand publication I remember circa 1975 was "Wow" (as I once mentioned, it was advertised as "Wow Is Mom Upside-Down", or possibly vice-versa if they were making a dirty joke for the six-year-olds in their target audience.) All I remember about it is that the graphic design was a total rip-off of "The Electric Company"'s rip-off of the whole Milton Glaser / Peter Max / Heinz Edelmann drug-induced aesthetic. > > Speaking of "Sesame Street" magazine, was there ever a "Canadian > > Sesame Street" magazine where Big Bird was crossed out and Basil, > > Dodi, and Louis were pasted in? > > Somewhere I still have an issue of the Arabic version of "Sesame Street" > magazine that has the noseless biped version of Snuffleupagus (sp?). And > it's read from right to left because the middle east is closer to Japan > than we are. Bert wasn't seen pictured with any ne'er do wells, no matter > what wacky internet trends of yesteryear not mentioned by USA Today would > lead you to believe. Noman the camel. He made international news when Saddam Hussein's troops annexed Kuwait (they stole the Noman puppet, temporarily halting the production of "Yaya Simsim".) Every licensed local version of "Sesame Street" has a different mentally- challenged child-proxy critter in place of Big Bird. In Mexico and South America, it's Abelardo Pajaro (big green parrot with a REALLY ANNOYING VOICE) and in Canada, it's Basil the big dumb bear. Noman is theirs. "Canadian Sesame Street" is an oddity in that it was first made from 3/4 American footage, with the Spanish stuff replaced with French stuff (Louis the otter is bilingual) and the letter "zee" changed to "zed". But even though it satisfied the rule that all Canadian TV has to have crudely-pasted-in "Canadian Content" (like the "Great White North" segments they added to "SCTV") it wasn't enough and there were worries that Canadian children would see too many American hand puppets on TV, so the program was retooled as "Sesame Park", an entirely Canadian production. Then I think it died and now the Canadians _only_ have access to American "Sesame Street", just as God intended. -- K. ...although I don't think he's the one controlling Elmo. ----------------------------------------------------- From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: sci.physics,alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: zero godz Hancher Followup-To: sci.physics Date: Thu, 04 Sep 2003 06:10:23 -0400 In sci.physics, "tj Frazir" (GravityPhysics@webtv.net) wrote: > > marten wants watt bob the coordinator and virgil the gravity virgin > gets. > OKKK ,,, > Hancher ,,,yer ass is hanging out where all the edu can see > ,,,,weeeeeeeeee peeeee Hey! No fair stealing Charles Nelson Reilly's little blue cards from "Match Game '76" to be the basis of your scientific theory! Give Charlie back his "wee-wee", his "bazooms", and his "Howard Cosell". > are da damb kids ever gong to have fun with you !!!! > well dumbass ,,, what the fuck will or wount I do to you for making > a mess in here with off topic bullshit. > Hancher ,,,the game could stop when you get the fuck out. > Go be a mess some where that aint fiz. > Or you and me have it out. > Im 8 feettall 520 lb. Just out of curiosity, is there a very large doorway somewhere where you've been charting your growth? You've grown at least twelve inches this year. Also, are those Advoirduopois pounds, Troy pounds, or Pretend pounds? > Im real mean ,,and I know who and what you are. I have evry name and > evry file. > Even off pc you no longer own. Um... "tj"... do you see that little logo that says "WebTV" on the front of your WebTV? Look at the logo. Dude, you've got a _WebTV_. It can't even hold _a_ file, let alone every file. > Make a fucking mess Ill clean yer clock. I doubt you could. My sources tell me that not only is every clock in your home smeared with a mixture of peanut butter and Brylcreem, but they're all blinking "13:00". > ay hancher ,,,wana play threw to the end or quit now ? I wanna buy a vowel. And some consonants. And all the other missing parts of whatever you were trying to communicate. -- K. I thought about trying to spell that so you could understand it, but nobody else would have understood if I had said "I wana bye a vole." ----------------------------------------------------- From: James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: I'm getting married... again! Date: Fri, 19 Sep 2003 03:03:21 -0400 I just thought I should break the news here before you read it in the New York Times: I'm getting married again, and this time, it's to the pleasant and multi-talented Jennifer Lopez, best known as the actress who plays "J.Lo" and was previously almost engaged to Ben Affleck. She's charming and witty and... OH HELL WITH IT, I CAN'T KEEP THIS UP, I WAS LYING! I WAS ABLE TO PRETEND I WAS MARRIED TO TV'S TORPID AND ANGULAR CLAUDIA CHRISTIAN FOR YEARS, AND THEN I WAS ABLE TO PRETEND I WAS MARRIED TO TV'S BLAND AND ANGULAR BARBARA BAIN FOR YEARS, BUT I CAN'T STAND EVEN ANOTHER MINUTE OF PRETENDING I OR ANYONE ELSE CARES ABOUT THE WORLD'S WORST ACTRESS AND WORLD'S WORST SINGER, JENNIFER LOPEZ, WHOEVER SHE IS! And yes, she's even less talented than _me_. Haw haw! So just to reiterate, I almost pretended to be married to Jennifer Lopez, except that I couldn't because even thinking about her for another second made half of my brain throw up all over the other half. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to stop pretending I'm married and go back to pretending to be single. Woo! Hey ladies, I'm single! -- K. P.S. Dear TV news, SHUT THE FUCK UP! I wanted to hear about new flavors of carbonated milk, not Jennifer Lopez!